Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

They say money doesn't bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it.
They say money doesn't bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it for themselves. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Money Quotes
Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. - Anonymous
Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
Always run away from temptations... but slowly, so they can catch up to you. - Anonymous
Always run away from temptations... but slowly, so they can catch up to you. Anonymous
Short Quotes Wise Quotes
According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.
According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings. Anonymous
Phone
I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Think Quotes
I really should do something with my life... maybe tomorrow. - Anonymous
I really should do something with my life... maybe tomorrow. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
But doctor, where is the umbilical cord? New technology, it's wireless. - Anonymous
But doctor, where is the umbilical cord? New technology, it's wireless. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right.
When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Know Quotes Life Quotes
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. - Anonymous
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Work Quotes
Men are like bank accounts.<br/> Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. - Anonymous
Men are like bank accounts.
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. Anonymous
Analogies Money Quotes
Life is always rocky when you're a gem. - Anonymous
Life is always rocky when you're a gem. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care?
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care? Anonymous
Math Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming. - Anonymous
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Be warned: I'm bored. This could get dangerous. - Anonymous
Be warned: I'm bored. This could get dangerous. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Every time we try to eat healthy along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday and ruins it for us. - Anonymous
Every time we try to eat healthy along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday and ruins it for us. Anonymous
Eat Quotes

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