Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom. - Anonymous
I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom. Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
When things get hot, they expand, so I'm just getting warmer, not gaining weight. Anonymous
The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat. It's watching what other people eat. Anonymous
Eat Quotes
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Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do. - Anonymous
Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Think Quotes
I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment. - Anonymous
I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment. Anonymous
Life Quotes Love Quotes Moments
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with.
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. - Anonymous
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen. - Anonymous
Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Got up this morning and ran around the block five times. Then I got tired, so I put the block back in the toy box. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes
Work is just something I'm doing until I win the lottery. - Anonymous
Work is just something I'm doing until I win the lottery. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
Men are like bank accounts.<br/> Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. - Anonymous
Men are like bank accounts.
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. Anonymous
Analogies Money Quotes
I hope we're good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. - Anonymous
I hope we're good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Good Quotes People Quotes
Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions.
Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings
One day you're 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you're 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice. - Anonymous
One day you're 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you're 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice. Anonymous
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