Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. - Anonymous
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Work Quotes
Sometimes I'm grateful that thoughts don't appear as bubbles over our heads. - Anonymous
Sometimes I'm grateful that thoughts don't appear as bubbles over our heads. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room. - Anonymous
My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room. Anonymous
Sayings
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4 out 3 people struggle with math. - Anonymous
4 out 3 people struggle with math. Anonymous
Math Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face.
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face. Anonymous
Life Quotes Top 100
I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom. - Anonymous
I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom. Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place. Anonymous
Life Quotes
Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do. - Anonymous
Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Think Quotes
Been there done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn. - Anonymous
Been there done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn. Anonymous
Sayings
Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? - Anonymous
Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? Anonymous
Life Quotes Money Quotes Phone
Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion.
Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion. Anger: The emotion that puts your fist in motion. Lesson: Don't be afraid or angry and you won't have to run and fight. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Witty Quotes
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. - Anonymous
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes
That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink. - Anonymous
That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink. Anonymous
Moments
I always knew I'd get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though. - Anonymous
I always knew I'd get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Witty Quotes
Want someone to stop texting you? Send back 'SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT." - Anonymous
Want someone to stop texting you? Send back 'SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT." Anonymous
Questions

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