Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle. - Anonymous
I'm on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Life Quotes
I just finally discovered what's wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left. - Anonymous
I just finally discovered what's wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left. Anonymous
Top 100 Wise Quotes
I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket." - Anonymous
I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket." Anonymous
People Quotes Questions Short Quotes
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If you know something will go wrong and you do everything to stop it from happening, then something else will go wrong. - Anonymous
If you know something will go wrong and you do everything to stop it from happening, then something else will go wrong. Anonymous
Sayings
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Eat Quotes
That moment when you spell a word so wrong, even auto-correct is like "I've got nothing man." - Anonymous
That moment when you spell a word so wrong, even auto-correct is like "I've got nothing man." Anonymous
Man Quotes Moments
I feel the best when I am happy.
I feel the best when I am happy. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared!
You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared! Anonymous
Animals Love Quotes Top 100
They say we learn from our mistakes, that's why I'm making as many as possible. Soon I'll be a genius. Anonymous
I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so. - Anonymous
I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. - Anonymous
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. Anonymous
Think Quotes Work Quotes
Dear auto-correct, that's not what I was trying to say. I'm getting tired of your shirt. - Anonymous
Dear auto-correct, that's not what I was trying to say. I'm getting tired of your shirt. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Some people have "aha" moments, I just have "Oh Seriously?" moments. - Anonymous
Some people have "aha" moments, I just have "Oh Seriously?" moments. Anonymous
Moments Short Quotes
I hate mosquitoes. I mean, I know I am delicious, but I don't give out free samples. - Anonymous
I hate mosquitoes. I mean, I know I am delicious, but I don't give out free samples. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. - Anonymous
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

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