Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at the floor, and think "I'd tap that." - Anonymous
I wonder if tap dancers walk into a room, look at the floor, and think "I'd tap that." Anonymous
Statements
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. - Anonymous
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes Top 100
Please God, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me. - Anonymous
Please God, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes
I can't wait until I'm old enough to pretend I can't hear. Anonymous
Short Quotes
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.
The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Work Quotes
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. - Anonymous
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes Love Quotes
All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you. - Anonymous
All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you. Anonymous
Work Quotes
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better!
Two mice are eating a movie film roll at a cinema when one says to the other: this movie is good, but the book was better! Anonymous
Animals Eat Quotes Good Quotes
Since there is only one of me, does that make me limited edition? - Anonymous
Since there is only one of me, does that make me limited edition? Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes Top 100
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. - Anonymous
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Work Quotes
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar. - Anonymous
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar. Anonymous
Analogies Drinking Wife Quotes
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. - Anonymous
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. Anonymous
Sayings
You and I are really more than friends. We're like a really small gang. - Anonymous
You and I are really more than friends. We're like a really small gang. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice? - Anonymous
How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice? Anonymous
Phone Questions Short Quotes

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