Anonymous Funny Quotes
A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.
I've always wanted to turn around in an executive chair and say "I've been expecting you."
Anonymous
The hardest part of trying to steal one sheep is stopping the rest of them from following.
Anonymous
Why does the bad piano player refuse to play when you offer him $100 to play? The neighbour already gave him $200 to stop playing.
Anonymous
I told my boss three companies were looking after me and I needed a raise. He asked who they were, so told him the gas, electric and cable company.
Anonymous
For 2019 I wish you 12 months of happiness, 52 weeks of fun, 365 days of success, 8760 hours of great health and 525600 lucky minutes! Happy New Year!
Anonymous
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.
Anonymous