Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen. - Anonymous
Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. - Anonymous
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
Instead of LOL why don't you try LOLWKASF: Laughing Out Loud While Keeping A Straight Face. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Witty Quotes
Of course I talk to myself... sometimes I need expert advice. - Anonymous
Of course I talk to myself... sometimes I need expert advice. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Think Quotes
I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels. - Anonymous
I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels. Anonymous
Friend Quotes
Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. - Anonymous
Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough. - Anonymous
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. - Anonymous
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Short Quotes
I finally found love... in Webster's dictionary, page 357 at the bottom right. - Anonymous
I finally found love... in Webster's dictionary, page 357 at the bottom right. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
Prescribed laughter
My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too many people were crying from laughter so it's no longer available. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
You're riding a horse full speed, and there's a giraffe on your left and a lion chasing you from behind, so what do you do? Get off the carousel! - Anonymous
You're riding a horse full speed, and there's a giraffe on your left and a lion chasing you from behind, so what do you do? Get off the carousel! Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Short Quotes
Got a new phone today, my old one failed the swimming test. - Anonymous
Got a new phone today, my old one failed the swimming test. Anonymous
Phone Sayings Short Quotes
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. - Anonymous
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't like the thought of being gone so long!
I'm not afraid to die. I just don't like the thought of being gone so long! Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes

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