Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

What I do when I see someone pretty is, I stare, I smile then when I get tired I put the mirror down.
What I do when I see someone pretty is, I stare, I smile then when I get tired I put the mirror down. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100
Ultimate lazy moment: Watching the sunrise on TV because you're too lazy to get up and watch it for real. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Ultimate lazy moment: Watching the sunrise on TV because you're too lazy to get up and watch it for real. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Moments TV Quotes
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes TV Quotes
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. - Anonymous
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. Anonymous
Analogies Never Quotes Short Quotes
I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my fingers, because I can always count on them. - Anonymous
I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my fingers, because I can always count on them. Anonymous
Sayings
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. - Anonymous
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. Anonymous
Good Quotes Lazy Quotes Life Quotes
Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase. - Anonymous
Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase. Anonymous
Questions
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. - Anonymous
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! - Anonymous
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. - Anonymous
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. - Anonymous
If you can't remember my name, just say "Chocolate" and I'll turn around. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
I wonder, we lazy people go to heaven... or do they send someone to pick us up? - Anonymous
I wonder, we lazy people go to heaven... or do they send someone to pick us up? Anonymous
Lazy Quotes People Quotes Questions
How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness. - Anonymous
How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness. Anonymous
Phone Questions Short Quotes
Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast as I could!
Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast as I could! Anonymous
Know Quotes Stupid Quotes
To the guy who created imaginary numbers in Math: I hate you.
To the guy who created imaginary numbers in Math: I hate you. Anonymous
Math Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

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