Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.
Give me your photo so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. - Anonymous
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. Anonymous
Never Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
A day without coffee is like something without something.
A day without coffee is like something without something. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from. - Anonymous
My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from. Anonymous
Analogies Internet
I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house. Anonymous
Marriage Quotes Money Quotes
A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. - Anonymous
A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. Anonymous
Math Quotes Wise Quotes
That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you're shopping for something else because they just won't budge. - Anonymous
That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you're shopping for something else because they just won't budge. Anonymous
Life Quotes Moments Top 100
I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. - Anonymous
I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.' Anonymous
Know Quotes Moments People Quotes
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. - Anonymous
Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you. Anonymous
Animals Cat Quotes Short Quotes
Age only matters if you are a cheese.
Age only matters if you are a cheese. Anonymous
Short Quotes
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Anonymous
Life Quotes Never Quotes Short Quotes
If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters. - Anonymous
If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
Sleeping is hard in the summer because the blankets are too warm, but without them I am vulnerable to monsters. - Anonymous
Sleeping is hard in the summer because the blankets are too warm, but without them I am vulnerable to monsters. Anonymous
Sayings Sleep Quotes Top 100
When I tried to do a search for marital advise on Google, it tried to finish my sentence for me, just like my wife does. Anonymous
Marriage Quotes Wife Quotes

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