Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent. Anonymous

Drinking Statements

Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart. Anonymous

Love Quotes Marriage Quotes

Don't press your luck, you might pop it. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Don't press your luck, you might pop it. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

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Out of my mind! Back in five minutes. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

Smile today, tomorrow could be worse. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes Top 100

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. Anonymous

Facebook Short Quotes Top 100

I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them. Anonymous

Know Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow. Anonymous

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old. Anonymous

Sayings

After a while, I eventually fell in love and there was nobody to pick me up. Anonymous

Love Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

Fortune cookie: You'll have a better fortune in the next cookie. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Short Quotes

Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. Anonymous

Funny Tree Quotes Moments Short Quotes

When I tried to do a search for marital advise on Google, it tried to finish my sentence for me, just like my wife does. Anonymous

Marriage Quotes Wife Quotes

Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing. Anonymous

Short Quotes Statements Stupid Quotes

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.' Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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