Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes. - Anonymous
I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes. Anonymous
Life Quotes
Be warned: I'm bored. This could get dangerous. - Anonymous
Be warned: I'm bored. This could get dangerous. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I'm not sure how long my body can handle this "getting out of bed early in the morning" nonsense. - Anonymous
I'm not sure how long my body can handle this "getting out of bed early in the morning" nonsense. Anonymous
Work Quotes
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Sure, I do marathons. On Netflix. - Anonymous
Sure, I do marathons. On Netflix. Anonymous
Short Quotes TV Quotes
It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already. - Anonymous
It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
Stop saying "B4" instead of "Before," you're ruining my Bingo game.
Stop saying "B4" instead of "Before," you're ruining my Bingo game. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
If every day is a gift, then today I got socks. - Anonymous
If every day is a gift, then today I got socks. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. - Anonymous
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
It may look like I'm doing nothing, but in my head I'm quite busy. - Anonymous
It may look like I'm doing nothing, but in my head I'm quite busy. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
The best way to show a giraffe your love is to knit a scarf for it. - Anonymous
The best way to show a giraffe your love is to knit a scarf for it. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day. - Anonymous
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Internet Lazy Quotes
I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you're wrong. - Anonymous
I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you're wrong. Anonymous
Short Quotes Wise Quotes
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better.
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better. :)
Life: LOL, give me a second! Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? - Anonymous
Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100

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