Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up. - Anonymous
At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right. Anonymous
Short Quotes Witty Quotes
I don't have bad handwriting, I'm just using my own font. - Anonymous
I don't have bad handwriting, I'm just using my own font. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
If Facebook has taught us anything it's that a lot of people aren't quite ready for a spelling bee. - Anonymous
If Facebook has taught us anything it's that a lot of people aren't quite ready for a spelling bee. Anonymous
Facebook People Quotes Top 100
Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply it by 9 and subtract 1. Now close your eyes. It's dark isn't it? - Anonymous
Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply it by 9 and subtract 1. Now close your eyes. It's dark isn't it? Anonymous
Math Quotes Think Quotes
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do. - Anonymous
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
Modern intelligence: if all bathrooms in the house are taken, turn off the internet. - Anonymous
Modern intelligence: if all bathrooms in the house are taken, turn off the internet. Anonymous
Internet Top 100 Witty Quotes
I'm having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by... - Anonymous
I'm having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by... Anonymous
People Quotes Phone Stupid Quotes
No, no, I'm listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once. - Anonymous
No, no, I'm listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter. - Anonymous
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter. Anonymous
Sayings Wise Quotes
My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes. - Anonymous
My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes. Anonymous
Facebook Friend Quotes Short Quotes
What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another hole to drain the water.
What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another hole to drain the water. Anonymous
Questions Stupid Quotes Top 100
If you ever get an email about pork, ham, salt, and preservatives, don't open it. It's spam - Anonymous
If you ever get an email about pork, ham, salt, and preservatives, don't open it. It's spam Anonymous
Sayings
My prince is not coming on a white horse... He's obviously riding a turtle, and definitely lost.
My prince is not coming on a white horse... He's obviously riding a turtle, and definitely lost. Anonymous
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