Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" - Anonymous
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" Anonymous
Phone Top 100
Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. - Anonymous
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. - Anonymous
My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Think Quotes
With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. - Anonymous
With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. - Anonymous
I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Do you ever go out, and then something happens ...
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Questions Think Quotes Top 100
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. - Anonymous
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. Anonymous
Short Quotes Witty Quotes
Stop destroying the Earth, it's where I keep all my stuff. - Anonymous
Stop destroying the Earth, it's where I keep all my stuff. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working. - Anonymous
Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working. Anonymous
Questions Stupid Quotes Top 100
If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. - Anonymous
If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
If you think nobody cares that you're alive try missing a couple of payments. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. - Anonymous
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. Anonymous
Analogies Money Quotes Short Quotes
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' - Anonymous
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' Anonymous
Top 100 Witty Quotes
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. - Anonymous
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes

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