Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute forget the fruit. Anonymous
Ever since it started snowing my husband is standing in front of the window and watching.
Ever since it started snowing my husband is standing in front of the window and watching. If the snow gets much worse, I might let him inside the house. Anonymous
Marriage Quotes
The only exercise I've done this month is running... out of money! Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Money Quotes Short Quotes
In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency notify:"I put "Doctor." - Anonymous
In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency notify:"I put "Doctor." Anonymous
Witty Quotes
He who wakes up early, yawns all day long.
He who wakes up early, yawns all day long. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
How was the dog's day? Ruff. - Anonymous
How was the dog's day? Ruff. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
What's your best non-swearing insult? I hope you step on a Lego. - Anonymous
What's your best non-swearing insult? I hope you step on a Lego. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. - Anonymous
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. - Anonymous
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes Top 100
I'm always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
How do you go to work? Forced! No, I mean how do you arrive there? Depressed. - Anonymous
How do you go to work? Forced! No, I mean how do you arrive there? Depressed. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
I don't want to adult today, I just want to dog. I'll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks. Anonymous
Dog Quotes Life Quotes
Smile like a monkey with a new banana. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe. - Anonymous
Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Exercise Quotes
I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest. - Anonymous
I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes

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