Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes
If I'm constantly bothering you, it means you're an important person. Anonymous
Short Quotes
Auto-correct is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things. Anonymous
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Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
If you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck. Anonymous
Short Quotes
How was the word "Wife" invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife. - Anonymous
How was the word "Wife" invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife. Anonymous
Questions Wife Quotes
True love isn't about what's on the outside, it's about what's on the inside.... the wallet. Anonymous
Love Quotes Money Quotes
My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can't fall asleep. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes
Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster so now we have to sit here until the store closes. Anonymous
When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog, like I'm a blackjack dealer... Anonymous
Animals
When a telemarketer calls, give the phone to the nearest child and tell them it's Santa on the phone! Anonymous
You never know what you have, until you clean your closet. - Anonymous
You never know what you have, until you clean your closet. Anonymous
Know Quotes Lazy Quotes Never Quotes
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. - Anonymous
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. Anonymous
Questions
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. - Anonymous
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. Anonymous
Top 100 Wise Quotes
I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

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