Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work. Anonymous
Phone Stupid Quotes Work Quotes
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. - Anonymous
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. Anonymous
Computers Short Quotes
The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!
The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep! Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
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Never run away when you see a bear, unless you know you can beat some of the other runners.
Never run away when you see a bear, unless you know you can beat some of the other runners. Anonymous
Life is too short to worry about matching socks. - Anonymous
Life is too short to worry about matching socks. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn, hardest thing in the world.
Waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn, hardest thing in the world. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Moments Short Quotes
Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. - Anonymous
Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. Anonymous
Love Quotes
Start each day with a positive thought, like: "I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours." - Anonymous
Start each day with a positive thought, like: "I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours." Anonymous
Life Quotes
What's best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies.
What's best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies.
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
You can talk to yourself and you can answer yourself, but if feel the need to pardon yourself, that's when you know something's wrong. - Anonymous
You can talk to yourself and you can answer yourself, but if feel the need to pardon yourself, that's when you know something's wrong. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings
What do you mean, my birth certificate expired? - Anonymous
What do you mean, my birth certificate expired? Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. - Anonymous
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. - Anonymous
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night. - Anonymous
I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night. Anonymous
Life Quotes

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