Anonymous Funny Quotes

Home / Authors / Anonymous / Page 75

A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Here's human empathy for you: Things die all over our windshields and we're like, "Man, I just washed this!" Anonymous

Life Quotes

I'm not sure what is more scary these days, checking my temperature or checking my weight. Anonymous

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn't know how awesome I was going to be today either. Anonymous

Work Quotes

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days. Anonymous

Short Quotes

What is the difference between having a cold beer and going to the bathroom? About 35 minutes. Anonymous

Beer Quotes Drinking Questions

Target cashier: Did you find everything you were looking for? Me: First of all, I wasn't looking for ANY of this. Anonymous

My new year's resolution was to quit all my bad habits, but then it occurred to me - nobody likes a quitter. Anonymous

I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before. Anonymous

Life Quotes Short Quotes

I didn't like my beard at first... then it grew on me. Anonymous

Short Quotes Wise Quotes

I don't care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive. Anonymous

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year's? Now we're old and cursing because we're staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed. Anonymous

Sleep Quotes

It's not that I want more shoes, it's just that they keep making them in my size. Anonymous

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: "Act normal, you are innocent." Anonymous

I don't know why everyone wants love like in the movies. A movie is only 2 hours. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

Funny Quote Topics

Recommended Sites

Search our Site