Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky. - Anonymous
I'm off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky. Anonymous
Short Quotes Sleep Quotes Wise Quotes
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car. - Anonymous
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car. Anonymous
Analogies Sleep Quotes Top 100
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive. - Anonymous
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic. - Anonymous
On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes
A good friend is like a bra: hard to find one you're comfortable with...
A good friend is like a bra: hard to find one you're comfortable with, always provides support, holds you tight and is always close to your heart. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Good Quotes
I can't sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge. - Anonymous
I can't sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
What do I do for a living? I breathe in and out. - Anonymous
What do I do for a living? I breathe in and out. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. - Anonymous
My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. Anonymous
Analogies Never Quotes Short Quotes
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me...
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven't offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly. - Anonymous
I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven't offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. - Anonymous
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. Anonymous
Statements Top 100
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! - Anonymous
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! Anonymous
Life Quotes Love Quotes People Quotes
In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep. - Anonymous
In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sleep Quotes Top 100
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! - Anonymous
I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes

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