Anonymous Funny Quotes
A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.
When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog, like I'm a blackjack dealer...
Anonymous
If zombies ever attack, just go to Costco. They have strong walls, years of food supplies, and Zombies can't get in because they don't have a membership card.
Anonymous
Life always has it's ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.
Anonymous
That awkward moment when it's quiet in class and your stomach decides to sound make whale mating sounds.
Anonymous
Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.
Anonymous
You know you're mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.
Anonymous
I lost my car chapstick and now my purse chapstick is in my room, and my room chapstick is in my car, and my whole life is just messed up.
Anonymous
If you were wondering about my culinary skills... I've been asked to bring paper towels to our family gatherings.
Anonymous