Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I asked my boyfriend when is his birthday is, and he said March 1st. So I marched in a circle around the room, then asked again. Anonymous

You know you're really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Yawning is the body's way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining. Anonymous

Short Quotes

I changed my alarm clock sound with an applause, it's the least I deserve for waking up at 7am. Anonymous

Work Quotes

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it. Anonymous

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

Unfortunately code brown doesn't mean someone brought chocolate. Anonymous

Short Quotes

What if one day Google stopped working and we couldn't Google what happened to Google? Anonymous

Internet

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad! Anonymous

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic. Anonymous

Here's to another day of outward smiles and inward screams. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado. Anonymous

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja. Anonymous

Short Quotes

The only warning I take seriously these days is when my cell phone battery is low. Anonymous

Phone

The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat. It's watching what other people eat. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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