Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief. - Anonymous
I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Short Quotes
I don't need a fancy watch to tell me I'm not fit one bit. - Anonymous
I don't need a fancy watch to tell me I'm not fit one bit. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Short Quotes
If I'm constantly bothering you, it means you're an important person. Anonymous
Short Quotes
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Don't blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August. - Anonymous
Don't blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous. - Anonymous
I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Honestly, I don't even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I'm like "I guess this is what we're doing now." Anonymous
Life Quotes
We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth. Anonymous
Here's human empathy for you: Things die all over our windshields and we're like, "Man, I just washed this!" Anonymous
Life Quotes
Target cashier: Did you find everything you were looking for? Me: First of all, I wasn't looking for ANY of this. Anonymous
The awkward moment when someone's zipper is down and you don't know whether to tell them or not. Anonymous
Moments
I think my soulmate might be carbs. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Happiness is eating an entire pizza in front of a friend who's on a diet. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Happy Quotes Short Quotes
That awkward moment when it's quiet in class and your stomach decides to sound make whale mating sounds. Anonymous
Auto-correct is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things. Anonymous
Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes

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