Latest Funny Quotes

I always knew I'd get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100 Witty Quotes

I'm not a morning person. I'm not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Top 100

I know some people don't like me, but what can I do, not everyone has good taste. Anonymous

People Quotes Top 100

Modern intelligence: if all bathrooms in the house are taken, turn off the internet. Anonymous

Internet Top 100 Witty Quotes

I don't understand people who say "I don't know how to thank you." Like they never heard of money. Anonymous

Money Quotes Top 100

Your secrets are safe with me... I wasn't even listening. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100 Witty Quotes

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100

Don't blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Never forget those who helped you along the way... Google, Wikipedia and Dictionary. Anonymous

Learn from the mistakes of others, you can never live long enough to make them all yourself. Groucho Marx

Life Quotes Top 100

I used to think I was indecisive, but I'm not too sure any more. Anonymous

Short Quotes Think Quotes

I already want to take a nap tomorrow. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. Anonymous

People Quotes

That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink. Anonymous

Moments

I'm so glad I learned about parallelograms instead of how to do taxes. It's ready handy this parallelogram season. Anonymous

Math Quotes

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