Latest Funny Quotes

I don't understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Interviewer: Would you say you are independent? Me: *looks at mum*, *mum nods* Me: I'd say so, yes. Anonymous

Work Quotes

I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" Anonymous

Phone Top 100

Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice. Anonymous

Sayings

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper "Nobody cares!" Anonymous

Questions

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after a vacation. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

I haven't tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor.. so I'm sure I wouldn't like Yoga. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes

I only have one wish in life... For all my dreams to come true. Anonymous

Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

You have Facebook? Yup. You have Whatsapp? Yup. You have love? Forgot to install it. Anonymous

Facebook Love Quotes Top 100

I'm not lazy, I'm waiting for inspiration to hit me... should be here any time now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Time Quotes

I don't know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up. Anonymous

Life Quotes

Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working. Anonymous

Questions Stupid Quotes Top 100

I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

It's almost bed time, so I'll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick. Anonymous

Facebook TV Quotes Time Quotes

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