Latest Funny Quotes

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Latest quotes in the order they were added.

Me: "I need help around here!" Then me again "No, not like that, here I'll do it." - Anonymous
Me: "I need help around here!" Then me again "No, not like that, here I'll do it." Anonymous
Know Quotes
A true friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg, even though they know you're slightly cracked. - Anonymous
A true friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg, even though they know you're slightly cracked. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Good Quotes Top 100
Interviewer: What do you make at your current job? Me: Mostly mistakes and inappropriate comments. - Anonymous
Interviewer: What do you make at your current job? Me: Mostly mistakes and inappropriate comments. Anonymous
Work Quotes
I only want one thing from fake people: distance. - Anonymous
I only want one thing from fake people: distance. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes
Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on. - Anonymous
Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on. Anonymous
Wise Quotes
Me and my best friend can communicate with just facial expressions. - Anonymous
Me and my best friend can communicate with just facial expressions. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes
I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen. - Anonymous
I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen. Anonymous
Top 100
I don't jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss. - Anonymous
I don't jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. - Anonymous
Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. - Anonymous
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. Anonymous
Top 100 Wise Quotes
If Facebook has taught us anything it's that a lot of people aren't quite ready for a spelling bee. - Anonymous
If Facebook has taught us anything it's that a lot of people aren't quite ready for a spelling bee. Anonymous
Facebook People Quotes Top 100
I'm super lazy today. It's like normal lazy but I'm wearing a cape. - Anonymous
I'm super lazy today. It's like normal lazy but I'm wearing a cape. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
Sometimes I can't tell if I'm in preschool or school... Oh wait, I'm at work. - Anonymous
Sometimes I can't tell if I'm in preschool or school... Oh wait, I'm at work. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes
I'm not feeling very worky today. - Anonymous
I'm not feeling very worky today. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
I'm not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing. - Anonymous
I'm not lazy, I just really enjoy doing nothing. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes

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