Anonymous Funny Quotes

Home / Authors / Anonymous  / Page 5

A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I hate it when people text "Call me." I'm going to start calling people and as soon as they answer I'll say "text me," then hang up. - Anonymous
I hate it when people text "Call me." I'm going to start calling people and as soon as they answer I'll say "text me," then hang up. Anonymous
People Quotes Statements
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. - Anonymous
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Wise Quotes
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. - Anonymous
The only sure way to make a computer go faster is to throw it out the window. Anonymous
Computers Short Quotes
Sponsored Links
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago? - Anonymous
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago? Anonymous
Questions Top 100
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. - Anonymous
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' - Anonymous
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' Anonymous
Funny Tree Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink. - Anonymous
That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink. Anonymous
Moments
That annoying moment when you're texting someone and auto-correct decides to join the conversation. Anonymous
Moments
Dear life, I understand very clearly that you are not fair so you can stop teaching me that lesson. - Anonymous
Dear life, I understand very clearly that you are not fair so you can stop teaching me that lesson. Anonymous
Life Quotes
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake. - Anonymous
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. - Anonymous
Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I'm not lazy, I'm on power saving mode. - Anonymous
I'm not lazy, I'm on power saving mode. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
A bald spot is like a lie, the bigger it gets the harder it is to cover it up. - Anonymous
A bald spot is like a lie, the bigger it gets the harder it is to cover it up. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes Top 100
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. - Anonymous
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it. Anonymous
Sayings
Every morning I do 10 sit-ups, to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock. - Anonymous
Every morning I do 10 sit-ups, to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

Funny Quote Topics

Recommended Sites

Pure Love Quotes Impressive Facts Best Positive Quotes

Search our Site