Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I end all my sentences with "Just saying.." because ending them with "You bonehead.." would probably be considered offensive. Anonymous
People Quotes
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better.
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better. :)
Life: LOL, give me a second! Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. - Anonymous
There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. Anonymous
Facebook Internet Life Quotes
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When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right.
When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Know Quotes Life Quotes
I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket." - Anonymous
I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket." Anonymous
People Quotes Questions Short Quotes
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. - Anonymous
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes Top 100
Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up.
Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up. Anonymous
Sayings Sleep Quotes Top 100
An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study. Anonymous
People Quotes
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Eat Quotes
Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day!
Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day! Anonymous
Good Quotes Work Quotes
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. - Anonymous
Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. Anonymous
Funny Tree Quotes Moments Short Quotes
Why didn't I use my turn signals? It's nobody's business where I'm going. - Anonymous
Why didn't I use my turn signals? It's nobody's business where I'm going. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition. - Anonymous
I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes

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