Top 100 Funny Quotes

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I love my job only when I'm on vacation.
I love my job only when I'm on vacation. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Lazy Quotes Love Quotes Sayings
You can trust your dog to guard your house.
You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Eat Quotes
I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot. - Anonymous
I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes
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Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. - Anonymous
Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.
Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done. Anonymous
Know Quotes Never Quotes Sayings
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. - Anonymous
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Statements
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. - Anonymous
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings Statements
Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it? - Anonymous
Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it? Anonymous
Moments Questions Short Quotes
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. - Anonymous
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. Anonymous
Questions Work Quotes
If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. - Anonymous
If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. Anonymous
Happy Quotes People Quotes Short Quotes
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it. Anonymous
Know Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. - Anonymous
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. Anonymous
People Quotes Stupid Quotes Time Quotes
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