Top 100 Funny Quotes

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I don't always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don't know exactly what they do. - Anonymous
I don't always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don't know exactly what they do. Anonymous
Math Quotes
I made my Facebook name "Benefits," so when you add me now it says "you're friends with benefits." - Anonymous
I made my Facebook name "Benefits," so when you add me now it says "you're friends with benefits." Anonymous
Facebook Friend Quotes
Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it? - Anonymous
Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it? Anonymous
Moments Questions Short Quotes
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If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. - Anonymous
If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. Anonymous
Happy Quotes People Quotes Short Quotes
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. - Anonymous
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. Anonymous
Questions Work Quotes
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it.
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it. Anonymous
Know Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself. - Anonymous
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Know Quotes Sayings
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Phone Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. - Anonymous
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. Anonymous
Know Quotes Love Quotes Stupid Quotes
I know some people don't like me, but what can I do, not everyone has good taste. - Anonymous
I know some people don't like me, but what can I do, not everyone has good taste. Anonymous
People Quotes
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open. Frank Zappa
Sayings Short Quotes
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. - Anonymous
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. - Anonymous
Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. Anonymous
Happy Quotes Life Quotes Stupid Quotes
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