Top 100 Funny Quotes
I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking.
Anonymous
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
Anonymous
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When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
Albert Einstein
There's something missing in my life, I just don't know if it's a puppy, a person, or a slice of pizza.
Anonymous
I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.
Anonymous
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.
Anonymous
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.
Anonymous
Displayed 166-180 of 400 quotes.