Top 100 Funny Quotes
I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.
Anonymous
You don't know something? Google it. You don't know someone? Facebook it. You don't know where something is? MOM!
Anonymous
I know the voices in my head aren't real..... but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome!
Anonymous
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The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
Anonymous
Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them?
Anonymous
I look at the moon and it looks really beautiful!.. Then I look at you... and.. I think I'll look at the moon again?!
Anonymous
Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time.
Anonymous
If you had to choose between eating tacos every day or being skinny for life would you choose hard or soft tacos?
Anonymous
Three monkeys escaped from the zoo, one was caught watching TV, the other playing hockey, and the third one was caught reading this quote!
Anonymous
Displayed 91-105 of 400 quotes.














