Top 100 Funny Quotes

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When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31.
When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes Work Quotes
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn't for throwing at people who stress you out? - Anonymous
So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn't for throwing at people who stress you out? Anonymous
Questions
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. - Anonymous
My decision making skills are as good as a squirrel that's crossing the street. Anonymous
Analogies Short Quotes
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Dear Humans, in case you forgot, I used to be your Internet.
Dear humans, in case you forgot, I used to be your Internet. Sincerely, The Library. Anonymous
Computers Internet
When you fall, I will be there to catch you.
When you fall, I will be there to catch you - With love, the floor. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
I believe there should be a better way to start each day... instead of waking up every morning.
I believe there should be a better way to start each day... instead of waking up every morning. Anonymous
Moments Sleep Quotes
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. - Anonymous
How do I like my eggs? In a cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. - Anonymous
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Anonymous
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes
Do you ever go out, and then something happens ...
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Questions Think Quotes
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Anonymous
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Love Quotes Short Quotes
If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth. - Anonymous
If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth. Anonymous
Life Quotes
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