Top 100 Funny Quotes

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"Revenge" sounds so mean, that's why I prefer to call it "Returning the favor." - Anonymous
"Revenge" sounds so mean, that's why I prefer to call it "Returning the favor." Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does! Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Phone
Do you ever go out, and then something happens ...
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Questions Think Quotes
Sponsored Links
With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. - Anonymous
With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller? - Anonymous
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller? Anonymous
Questions
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. - Anonymous
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. - Anonymous
When someone yells stop I don't know whether it's in the name of love, it's Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers. Anonymous
Know Quotes Love Quotes Stupid Quotes
I followed a diet but it didn't follow me back, so I unfollowed it. - Anonymous
I followed a diet but it didn't follow me back, so I unfollowed it. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. - Anonymous
Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. Anonymous
Short Quotes
My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn't be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn't be beauty, so the world needs you after all.
My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn't be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn't be beauty, so the world needs you after all. Anonymous
Sayings Stupid Quotes World Quotes
Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. - Anonymous
Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes People Quotes Short Quotes
When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31.
When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes Work Quotes
I want to change my name on Facebook to "Nobody," so when I see someone posting something stupid I can Like their post and it will say "Nobody likes this." - Anonymous
I want to change my name on Facebook to "Nobody," so when I see someone posting something stupid I can Like their post and it will say "Nobody likes this." Anonymous
Facebook
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago? - Anonymous
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago? Anonymous
Questions
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