Top 100 Funny Quotes

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Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. - Anonymous
Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Never ask a starfish for directions. - Anonymous
Never ask a starfish for directions. Anonymous
Never Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
You never realize what you have until it's gone. Toilet paper is a good example. - Anonymous
You never realize what you have until it's gone. Toilet paper is a good example. Anonymous
Sayings
But when you fart just one time...
Most of the time... when you're crying, nobody notices your tears.
Most of the time... when you're worried, nobody feels your pain.
Most of the time... when you're happy, nobody sees your smile.
But when you fart just one time... Anonymous
Happy Quotes Sayings Time Quotes
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. - Anonymous
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff. - Anonymous
So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones... that's why it's called a "cell" phone. - Anonymous
I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones... that's why it's called a "cell" phone. Anonymous
Phone Sayings
I'm so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-top on top of it. - Anonymous
I'm so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-top on top of it. Anonymous
Sayings
Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow.
Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years. - Anonymous
I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years. Anonymous
Life Quotes Stupid Quotes
Whenever I'm sad, you're there. Whenever I have problems, you're there. Whenever I lose control, you're there. Let's face it, you are bad luck. - Anonymous
Whenever I'm sad, you're there. Whenever I have problems, you're there. Whenever I lose control, you're there. Let's face it, you are bad luck. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
It was me, I let the dogs out. - Anonymous
It was me, I let the dogs out. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
Cheer myself up.
I always try to cheer myself up by singing when I get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems. Anonymous
Moments Time Quotes
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller? - Anonymous
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller? Anonymous
Questions
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