Top 100 Funny Quotes

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That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you're shopping for something else because they just won't budge. - Anonymous

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you're shopping for something else because they just won't budge. Anonymous

Life Quotes Moments

Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. - Anonymous

Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. Anonymous

Questions Work Quotes

You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!'

You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!' Anonymous

Know Quotes Stupid Quotes

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth. - Anonymous

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth. Anonymous

Life Quotes

I've made it from the bed to the couch. There's no stopping me now. - Anonymous

I've made it from the bed to the couch. There's no stopping me now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

How do I like my eggs? In a cake. - Anonymous

How do I like my eggs? In a cake. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. - Anonymous

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. Anonymous

People Quotes Sayings

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Anonymous

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous

Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry! - Anonymous

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry! Anonymous

Eat Quotes Love Quotes Sayings

I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them. - Anonymous

I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them. Anonymous

Know Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes

That awkward moment you can't understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times. - Anonymous

That awkward moment you can't understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times. Anonymous

Moments Time Quotes

Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday? - Anonymous

Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday? Anonymous

Questions Short Quotes Work Quotes

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it's like a present from me to me. - Anonymous

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it's like a present from me to me. Anonymous

Love Quotes Sayings

I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. - Anonymous

I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes Love Quotes

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful. - Anonymous

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes

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